Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Pissed Off (and on...)

Our patio has had a strange odor for the past month. At first we tried to find out what the source was, and then we just decided to be smart about the whole situation and not go on the patio anymore.....

Obviously that didn't last long since I am trapped in a two bedroom apartment with two crazy kids. We have to get out every once in a while or the neighbors start calling DFACS. So I was noticing that there was a lot of dog doo in the desert grass (rocks) in front of our patio. I called the manager to complain and he said he would send the grounds people back to rake it up. But there was just a new stash of doodie the next day. Then some strange things started appearing (a bag of poop in one of our bushes, a dustpan smeared with...guess....that's right... it-shay) that made me start questioning this smell a little more. Finally, I came out to the patio one day and found a turd (I'm going to try to use a new word for it each time it is mentioned) balancing on top of my gate. I thought, "Wow- either that is an EXTREMELY limber dog, or that crap came from above."

So my next call to the manager was to tell him that I was pretty sure the people two stories above us were letting their dogs stinky on the balcony and then they were sweeping it over the edge...and therefore poisoning the tiny piece of ground that my children have on which to play. As you can imagine, I was slightly peeved.

All my assumptions were confirmed today as I stood at the edge of my patio watching my precious children "get out their energy" (this is what I call it when the neighbors give us crusty looks...but they usually don't think it's as cute as I do- or so I have gathered from all the fingers I have been shot). So, I'm standing there talking to my neighbor and all of a sudden Hazel says "It's raining!" just as I feel a few droplets of liquid hit my head. I quickly jumped out of the way and looked up to see a sweet doggie pissing on my head from the balcony above.

Of course I immediately called my manager back and gave him an earful (I might have used even more vulgar language than "pissing"). But I just don't feel like anything he does can make up for the damage to the things on my patio, not to mention the emotional damage after having my head peed on. So I am contemplating revenge. My father had the INGENIOUS suggestion of filling a water gun with my own pee and squirting it through her windows (which are always open). So, unless you have an even better suggestion, expect to hear about my water gun skills in the near future. :)

6 comments:

Paige said...

That suggestion from dad sounds pretty smart...but extremely disgusting. Is this like an old woman up there or what? Why the heck can't she take her freaking dog down one flight of stairs a few times a day? If she's unable to do that, then she shouldn't be allowed to have a dog. I'm sorry...this is just too disgusting. I'm pissed off now too.

Lindsey said...

Tell me about it! She is on the third floor, but it's not like it's a high rise or something. She leaves them on the balcony ALL DAY while she is at work.

Teresa said...

I am shocked by the lack of respect some people have for other people and their space. Your neighbor upstairs should not be a pet owner, if she's too stinkin' lazy to take her pet down to the ground to do it's business. Certainly, she had to know what damage the doggie droppings were doing to your deck and belongings. Some people. If your apartment manager doesn't take action, and NOW, .... uh, I just don't know what! This is really unbelievable, and yet not. Some people.

sondra german said...

uh i'd sling-shot that it-shay right back up on her patio... better yet, sling-shot some open cups of chocolate pudding... or more extreme, call the cops... isn't that defacing (defacating) someone's property? ugh... i now I'M pissed. they should make her move to a first floor apartment... and that's the LEAST they should make her do. grrr.

Anonymous said...

what the crap?? Literally.
People are so rude and inconsiderate. I would have marched myself up there and shook my head in her face and said, "Oh did I get you wet? Sorry, just a little friendly dog pee. Apparently you like to share!"

sondra german said...

justin said to go the any place that sells hunting supplies and purchase some deer urine. load THAT in the squirt gun and spray it up there. he says she'll NEVER get rid of that smell... or so he's heard... ;)