In the future...

Hazel loves the idea of Lunchables. She begs for them every time we go to the grocery store, then begs to eat them every day. The thing is, she doesn't actually like them. Every once in a while she will be starving and, therefore, manage to eat the whole thing. But 9 times out of 10, she eats the first bite of whatever meat is included in that day's Lunchable and decides that the meat is "disgusting." This inevitably leads to her refusal to take another bite of anything in that little plastic, compartmentalized tray of processed foods.

We are finally over giving her chance after chance to prove to us that she can be a big girl and eat the whole thing. It's just such a waste of money. So Nathan came home today right as I was getting frustrated with Hazel for wasting yet another valuable Lunchable. I was getting a little worked up, so he jumped in and took over the conversation, using his usual sarcastic drama to make fun of my genuine drama.

Nathan: "Hazel, that’s it. You are never getting lunchables again."
Hazel: "That’s fine. I hate them. The meat is disgusting."
Nathan: "You’re not getting any more lunchables and you’re not going to college."
Hazel: "What’s cobbleage?"
Nathan: "Cobbleage is where you are going to be begging me to go when you are 18."
Hazel: "I can go to cobbleage if I want to!"
Nathan: "You can? Well you better work hard then, cause you’re going to have to do it on your own."
Hazel: "But I can’t drive!"
Nathan: "You’ll be able to when you’re that old. But I’m not going to buy you a car either."
Hazel: "Fine. I’ll just steal your car."
Nathan: "Well, you are your mother’s child, so that wouldn’t surprise me."